When you lost your key, then lost my key, then called me to ask if I could rummage around in your room to look for it, I took this to be a seductive invitation to contract dysentery.
As I rummaged, I noticed with delight that you are not a person that buys into globalised, polluting mega-corp make up brands that clutter up your cosmetic bag. Instead you have chosen to substitute all these superfluous capitalist excesses with one half-eaten Mars bar.
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